none

My 23rd year of life approaches. I can see it looming in a distance, it will be closely followed by a few quick milestones leading me to age 30; and thus the downward, or upward, however optimistic you are, spiral of my short life. In a few rare quiet moments I like to follow the few rabbit trails that led me to where I am today. The prayers my parents had for me, the interests they encouraged, God's ultimate plan for my life which liked to tip, turn, and knock over things I pursued and tried to plan mySELF. And the big obvious influences. A hop skip and jump it felt like from age 5 until now. A blink. And yet, the painfully slow processes in between....

Which brings me here. 22 years old. Missing that 12 year old me. Wondering where the last 10 years has gone...And wondering if old Kate would be proud of THIS Kate...

Honestly,she would be sorely disappointed. Mainly because she won't understand the choices I made until she LIVES. She is young, naive, and oh so judgmental, but it is true in many ways I let her down.
If she knew that I was contemplating using a $30 off coupon to make a particular pair of jeans affordable, she would scream.
If she knew words I have said, hurtful things, to friends and family, she would be appalled.
If she knew how low my spiritual low points have hit these last 10 years she would weep with worry for her soul!
If she knew about all books read, movies seen, lips kissed, even adventures experienced; everything that has shaped me, for better and worse, into the adult I am now, Would she understand?
She would stare forlornly at my knitting box and sewing machine untouched this entire year.
She would look at my phone in and out calls and miss certain names who don't call 'round anymore, and with whom I have stopped making an effort.
She would go through my computer files looking for 'that novel' to be finished and still find random bits all over the place.
She'll be disappointed I don't do karate anymore, she will wonder why my used point shoes aren't hanging my office wall.


Well, I think she would like my new Bible, and how much I am trying to read regularly, She would like that I still underline parts that stab me hard. That I still weep when reading Augustine's confessions, and I still love my family more than anything, although the family has grown by 2.

She would listen to me talk about my job, and wonder why I don't leave, why I have sold out and am still complaining,age 12 or 23 about 'not being understood.'

She would tell me to grow up.

haha this was really fun to analyze. Oh Kate you silly silly girl. (um the 12 and 22 year old one)

peace

"My God is so great So strong and so mighty there's nothing my God cannot do!" ~An old CEF song I used to sing at Bible Clubs

I am just going to be brutally honest. A stressful couple of weeks of work, right along with a stressful couple of weeks waiting out an apparently 50 day *cycle*, I have been a stressed mess.

Now my husband is constantly teaching me what I thought I would teach him about contentment, (Thomas Watson's the Art of Divine Contentment being one of my all time favorite life changing reads). He is the epitome of support and love when I fall to pieces. (Joseph not THomas Watson....ok Thomas Watson too, but here I mean Joseph)

And when I expect him to stress and question God, he points me more towards Christ and in no uncertain terms reminds me that God's plans are perfect and my plans are not.

These past few weeks I had to face my selfishness head on. ( a whole other blog post would be how marriage, in general, has shown me more than anything else, what a HORRIBLY SELFISH person I actually am)

I have felt so overwhelmed, but after much prayer with my husband, and with a lovely lady from COPC (who lets me bang on her piano every week as well) I feel so very at peace today. And with that peace came a few answers.

I am newly motivated and dedicated, was extremely productive at work, have new goals and aspirations, and feel joyful and FULL as I continue praying for joy and contentment as God's plan for my life slowly dissolves mine.

Inspirational food for my thoughts 1 peter 1:8 "Though you have not seen him, you love him. Though you do not now see him, you believe in him and rejoice with joy that is inexpressible and filled with glory, obtaining the outcome of your faith, the salvation of your souls."

heart

"Be your best friend, tell the truth overuse 'I Love yous'", go to work, do your best don't outsmart your common sense. Never let your praying knees get lazy, and love like CRAAAAZZZYYYY!"

I learn so much from country songs just when I need the encouragement most.

The diary of a fly

I used to play this piece on the piano by Bartok called the Diary of a Fly. Youtube it. It is fabulous. and short. And I loved playing it back in the day when I had talent :-)
I remember after a fundraising performance I had played someone came up to me at the mingle time after the concert and said "I would tell you that you played beautiful, except that piece is anything but beautiful!" ummmm thanks?? It was true the dissonance of Bartok's genius could be unnerving to some, and as much as I loved the piece it wasn't necessarily enjoyable to my audience. Of all my piano performances in my 12 years of classical piano, this incident has never left my mind. And lately I feel I relate to my Bartok performances more than ever before. I could perform technically flawless in....let's say 'life' and still its just not what someone wanted to hear. Personal preference. Biased opinion. Subjective assessments. When your best just isn't good enough. ouch?

I guess that is why we can only perform our best and try to see God as our only audience, my job is glorify HIM and enjoy HIM forever right? Easier said then done...

I suppose a thank you to Bartok is in order for a life lesson

thank goodness for husbands

Joseph is fixing my flat tire before I go to work and he goes to the Chili cook off. How awesome, I didn't notice my tire was leaking *yet* So he is getting that taken care of. I love having a husband that is JOSEPH!

nice and quiet

Joseph is in Sierra vista watching football with my dad. And as guilty as I feel about not watching the Steelers play, after this really long week, I am enjoying watching hours and hours of the office and scrapbooking.

The making strides for the cure against Breast Cancer walk went well today. Working the survivor tent with Kellye and another CST therapist was fun. It did not seem to be as busy as last year but still the women as always seem super grateful.

My lazy self is not used to waking at 5:30 am. .....and for some reason I had a horrbile time falling asleep last night! I am sure I will rest solid tonight.

There is much I could blog about... othoer MTs who are annoying....
some new things I am intersted in FST fascial Stretch Therapy....

And FUZZ!! Love this video on youtube about Fascia. Nerdy but I LOVE IT
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_FtSP-tkSug

"I don't see it, I think they both could do better."

Its been a while since I have blogged. But because there is 2 loads of laundry waiting, dishes in the sink, homework to attend to and some take-home projects from work to tackle... it seems like the perfect time to blog.

Today was a horrible day to wake up. I thought today was going to be awful. I didn't even want to give it a chance. I whined and moaned to my husband about how much I didn't want today to be.... "noooooo, I don't like today." Then Joseph reminded me why today was going to be great. no.... why today was going to be FANTASTIC. and even more so that today was going to be MEMORABLE. I smiled, shaped up, and went out to face this 'today'... and it was good.

I am going to take bad days at that from now on...what I might consider a bad day might be the best day of someone's life, and why be a joy kill? And who am I to claim that I KNOW when God is going to teach me, show me, or love on me in someway special?

However, there was one reason that today was extra special. My brother is engaged. There. The secret is out! My brother proposed to miss Katie Cheney today and I will soon have a sister! hooray! Words can't cover the joy in my heart for this couple. For me to find someone I consider worthy of my brother is one thing....but to have met Katie and question if my brother is even worthy of her...... means that this is going to be epic.

So, wedding bells will chime once more in the Fink household!

"And we're the 4 best friends that anyone could have.." :-)

The way I are....

DabuDidabuDiDabuDI Dabu DI....I'm BLUE!!! heheeh remember that awesome song??
Tonight, I am working on playlists for my newly working ipod. It deserves a new playlists. Adding such titles as "DANCE" "TECHNO sorta" "My name is Kate... and I like to Party" & "Daydream."

Today was my husband's Birthday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY you Old FART~!!

Getting ready for my vacation. I could not be more excited for a few days off.
Things have been very frustrating at work.
My whole life I have been in situations where I was ahead of the game, young for whatever i was taking part in....this situation is no exception; save for the fact my inexperience gets in my own wya sometimes and frustrates me. And my boss tends to 'tease' ... in the sense my administrative inexperience she thinks is 'cute' 'adorable' etc. my nerves are frayed with in an inch of my sanity.
TO top it off business is pretty slow for the summer.

Trying to decide on one piece of good reading material for my trip. And of course indulge in my usual airport magazine...probably Vogue. Or maybe a Good Housekeeping?? You can see my life priorities are torn...

grrrr

"Hope has two beautiful daughters: their names are anger and courage. Anger that things are the way they are. Courage to make them the way they ought to be."~ saint augustine

I have the anger but am a cowardly mouse.

joyness

Joseph and I have had a an amazing 1 year anniversary...the aquarium, hiking, rock climbing, Inception, my family, his family, my bro and Katie, and BUFFY!

Rock climbing could become very addictive. Forget me being afraid of heights, finally letting go was exhilarating!

I have a love hate relationship with hiking. Hate that its a fight to get going, especially in high altitude like yesterday Mind over matter.... in which I always win. LOVE that middle part where we stop, sit, and enjoy God's glorious creation!! Both of us quiet and contemplative. And LOVE the trip back to the car...the last half. However, I hate the drive home for some reason; probably cause I am usually dehydrated and feel sick haha.

A glorious weekend with hubby, family and friends. And year old cake ..blech :-)

I can't believe I have been married one year today to Joseph! 3 years since we met... time flies when you're having fun

Missing you somthing aweful

People come and go in our life like the weather. Sometimes when I reminisce I dedicate songs to them. Entire playlists for others. You'd be surprised, you should ask me what YOUR song is!

When I reminisce about some people I am always surprised about even the smallest, most insignificant of relationships can have such an impact on my life.

Back on the Roof Again

Back on the couch again. I just can't sleep sometimes. Maybe it is the Frozen yogurt from an earlier BTO session with ashflash..... :-)

And here I am again. Back on the couch. It's 1 am. And I am exhausted, no ready for another long work day.
I guess I am just letting all the stress get to me; it makes me want to tear my hair out some days. It feels so grown up!! And lonely. And stressful. And sometimes exciting. Like a constant reminder of how insignificant I am in God's much bigger world.

Marriage

I am blessed to be married to the awesome-est guy ever. but let's be honest, even when you are married to Mr. Awesome, Marriage is a challenge.

I have always said, even before I was married, that marriage is like any other 'job' in life....Something you have to work at everyday. Well, now that I am almost a full year married, I can now say with CONVICTION, that I was VERY RIGHT!!

However, the interesting thing to me, is that the challenges I assumed we would have are not an issue, it is always the things I, again ASSUMED, were too simple too be an issue! awww such is life. Such is marriage.

And THAT is why God gave us humor, then the end of the 'little' thing fights can be funny! sometimes.... :-)

In Transit

Reality. MY REALITY. Slaps me upside the head sometimes. As Reese from Malcolm in the Middle once said "I used to think thoughts; now my thoughts are thinking thoughts.... it's like I think....therefore I.....oh wait... I JUST HAD IT!"

haha However, what is "Epiphan-atic" (epiphany -like for those who don't speak my made up words) for me, may for a reader be a 'well DUH k8,' so feel free to cease reading.

Epiphanies for me are usually in the terms of thinking about life while driving to or from work. Life not in terms of time; I know my life is short, I have never feared the end of it... I know where my heart is and I know who holds me, but more in terms of, the life I always thought i could and SHOULD live. The things I dreamed I would do or accomplish. The woman I wanted and believe i can and should be, the things I feel I need to and am meant to say. I have always thought in the eventually. But good grief Self, I am 22 years old, the eventually has not only started, but has started to pass me up! Time to start living up to my own expectations!But then of course there is facing what that actually means...... taking responsibility for the goals I have set for myself. Hard work. Doubling my work ethic. and OH YEAH. Narrowing down what my goals are exactly... hmmmmm oh reality why must you stifle my dreams??

And for THAT matter who am I to set expectations to begin with? My God's plan for my life is so much bigger than what pathetic little thoughts my brain could ever even HOPE to muster. And how is it I BEG God to use me for greater things, when I can hardly manage to my small tasks acceptably? I always pray I can live each day to his Glory, and I can only KEEP praying that my pathetic attempts even scratch the service of what should be God glorifying actions. I am thankful I serve a forgiving, gracious Lord.

Let Freedom Ring

What an awesome day! I love the 4th of July, Dad's cooking YUM, HOURS of Boggle with my hubby and Cargo Pants. I love fireworks, I think they are the kewlest most romantical summer activity EVER. And for the first tie ever I got to share the experience with my Joseph. Luscious. :-)


too tired to blog now. MOre tomorrow

Top Gun Party!!

ummmmm I am maverick in my flight suit!... Ashley is just...hott..... *eyeroll* :-P

Michael put that camera down...and I am ninja!!

Chris, Chris, and ashley's foot

Me and my maverick. JOSEPH YOU BIG STUUUUDDDDD!!!
We are so much cooler than we used to be...

BALLOONS




Parachute men in honor of Goose NOT making it...


Dog tags etc...

PLANES

JOSEPH'S HEAD FULL OF BALLOONS!!

Chris, corey and joseph...


We had food, beer, toys, and TOP GUN TRIVIA!! hung out, and watched Top Gun...sort of.

An awesome excuse to get people together to hang out, MORE IN THE FUTURE FO' SHO'!!

"blow a kiss to the judges!"

nothing more comforting than a brand new FULL episode of Toddlers and Tiaras on TLC! Really makes me feel like my parents were the BEST! Those parents are nuts and I LOVE IT LOVE IT LOVE IT!

I also just cramped my hand filing my nails. owe...silly LMT that I am always filing
my nails you would think I'd have it down by now but NOPE not a chance...
Getting a massage this week and can't wait! My shoulder is out in the way it likes to do every few months (supraspinatus) ... Trigger Point work..DELICIOUS

HAPPY FATHER'S DAY!!
I have the best father ever, and feel blessed more than ever to celebrate as God gave him to us for a while longer after that horrific scare in February... PRAISE GOD! I could go on for days about my dad, how proud I am of him, how he's inspired me over the years....how every little thing we DO have in common makes me beam on the inside. ooohh to have a FRACTION of my Father's intelligence as an adult would make me thrilled beyond belief! oh and his sense of humor.. Only in my family... Yesterday I had him cracking up by singing my newest parody song about parents who do not vaccinate their children called "I'm bringing Polio back' sung to the tune of Justin Timberlake's sexy back. wow. only in my family would we find that hilarious. ooh anyway.. I LOVE MY DAD

Frustrated Mess

Annoyed. Had Doc Appointment today, I have had more this year than any other year of my life! Thankfully I love my Naturopaths, it gets $ though. And again today...more blood work, a whole other CBC. grrrrrr. And of course hubby gets frustrated with why they want to follow these little health quirks of mine to begin with; I guess its really not as cynical as it sounds but after work, appointments, clients etc I just feel so weighed down and even more stressed with his comments... and I get more stressed..which is half the problem to begin with!! Kind of funny in the end I guess.

I work with people everyday who are searching for some type of fulfillment, asking me what I believe about 'Zen' peace, Karma, etc....and i hear about their searching, their unrest; their earthly stores that are leaving them nowhere but lonely. And it saddens me. But looking into a mirror I see I have a Savior who loves me more than a non-Christian could ever fathom, and still I choose to be discontent?? What kind of ungrateful sinner am I?

oh Self..... GAAAHHHH GRRRRRR GAAAAHHHHH

can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky...blahblah blah

Watching Suze Orman with the husband. ABSOLUTELY LOVE THIS SHOW. She is like Dr. Laura only not a TOTAL .... Mean lady...

blogeeeeeeeeblog

This week has been nuts with house crazies! Had a fun weekend though and hopefully will make today productive and my work-week transition smooooooothhhh.

I did have a confrontation with a HORRIBLY rude person this week. I was astounded at the disrespect and means at which she addressed me, snarling questions because I sounded 'too young' and 'inexperienced' to be of any use to her, the funny part was she ended up scheduling an appointment with me and at the end our conversation SWITCHED tones completely with a sweet "alright Katelyn thank you so very much have a great day!" I probably stood with my mouth hanging open.... ?? Maybe I won that round...
people are fun.

Maybe some day for at least 1 month, I should work in a job that doesn't deal with people! haha nah i would never last... but people can be EXHAUSTING!!

Still plugging through my orthopedic certification. slowly slowly...

Mmmmmmmmmmmmy Mondays! Joseph is off too, what to accomplish? We already conquered lazing in bed until 10, facebooking, searching for free downloads of Bridezilla, and talked about talking to hte Verizon people today. ahhhh already productive :-)

hohum

I hate it when God's clear answer is 'NO'. But I REALLY wanted it to be 'YES.'
I also hate it when I worry about the stupidest little things. It is almost like God saying "Be anxious for nothing" falls on completely deaf K8 ears.

Tomorrow is such a big day....

Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray.Pray. ING!?

Take me or Leave Me

Megan has moved back to Tucson... YEEEEEEEEEEESSSS. ahhhhhh the memories she bring back.

Whatif by Shel Silverstein

Last night, while I lay thinking here,
some Whatifs crawled inside my ear
and pranced and partied all night long
and sang their same old Whatif song:
Whatif I'm dumb in school?
Whatif they've closed the swimming pool?
Whatif I get beat up?
Whatif there's poison in my cup?
Whatif I start to cry?
Whatif I get sick and die?
Whatif I flunk that test?
Whatif green hair grows on my chest?
Whatif nobody likes me?
Whatif a bolt of lightning strikes me?
Whatif I don't grow talle?
Whatif my head starts getting smaller?
Whatif the fish won't bite?
Whatif the wind tears up my kite?
Whatif they start a war?
Whatif my parents get divorced?
Whatif the bus is late?
Whatif my teeth don't grow in straight?
Whatif I tear my pants?
Whatif I never learn to dance?
Everything seems well, and then
the nighttime Whatifs strike again!

Reminiscing

As I am working my way through season 4 of "Say Yes to the Dress" on Netflix online..... I am reminiscing of course.

It made me think of that time I GOT MARRIED TO MY LOVE!

There are so many special things about the day and events surrounding the wedding... I never wrote anything to remember these precious moments and memories

These are my memories...

I was shocked and awed by the amount of family who made the effort to get to AZ from PA, FL, CA etc... My poppop and his wife Sharon, Aunt Angie, Uncle Dave, Makayla, Gianna, Uncle bob and Aunt Lori, Grandma and Papap, Seth, Josh, and Nate, Aunt Laura, *deep breath* Uleonard, Aunt Joyce, Mike, CHanda and tucker.... and a few more various cousins and Josephs relatives as well. I was amazed by the out of state family that came, let along the mass of friends locally who blessed us.

My Veil
My mother made my veil. Such a simple phrase but the hours of trial and error work and detailed sewing that went into this piece brings tears every time I think about it.


My whole outfit ensemble is a precious memory..
My darling Nana, my mother's mother, does not travel and was unable to be there with me. Months ahead of time 'we' online shopped to find the perfect necklace which was Nana's gift for my wedding day. So that every time I open my jewlery box I will think of her. Joseph bought earings to match. I though it was a wonderful unplanned bonding of Josephine Salvatori and Joseph Faith even though they have yet to meet.
My beaded bracelet was Great-Nana Salvatori's, as a little girl I always longed to wear it on a formal occasion. I thought it matched the beading on my dress perfectly!
AND... the ring on my right hand was a gift my father gave my mother in the beginning of their marriage.

The dress itself Joseph helped me pick out! We had been in a bridal store and it was on a mannequin and he said "I don't know why you think dress shopping is so hard, that one would look great on you!" yeah. Whatever Joseph. I have watched seasons and seasons of Say Yes to the Dress, Bridezilla, style networking, wedding movies etc. Silly boys don't know how hard it is....... He doesn't know what he's saying.... Fast-forward a few weeks in the same store with mom, dad, and future-hubby...sure enough. That was it!

My Pittsburgh Steeler garters, sparkly shoes, and hairstyle were actually semi-original ideas of mine! :-)

For one of my bridal showers my aunt a 2 gal cousins flew out to surprise me. I was ecstatic! That is no small task to fly out with two little ones with colds!
Such an awesome family I have!



The old friends I grew up with!



and new one's I have made along the way...


the candies my Aunt Angie spent HOURS making the week before the wedding! All the way from PA and we stuck her with candy molds, melts and a microwave and said "GOOD LUCK"!




Other memories are not as sweet. Poor little Gianna was so very sick the entire time, and still had such a sweet temperament. Here she is a few hours before flying back to PA. Waiting for hours in the ER with her Uncle Vic. she was well a few weeks later



MY beautiful mother. And my handsome brother





And my dad. He has always been able to help me make decisions.. so of course the night before my wedding we had the very serious "It's not too late to call if off" father daughter talk....





There are thousands of precious memory drops in my wedding bucket, my sweet family, my hilarious, gracious friends, and all those who actually 'made it happen'...

However, a very big memory of course is Joseph
... ...
....




I love my husband.


From our few precious moments before being husband and wife...





To that whole new person he was our first days of marriage; still goofy and fun but So gentle and kind and patient and loving.




9 1/2 months of marriage gone..... FINALLY getting some of my special memories down. I love my husband, I am so blessed for the wedding we were able to have and celebrate with family and friends.

In conclusion, I loved my wedding. I love my husband, I am so blessed to have the family and friend support system. Keep in mind getting married is exhausting! Thank goodness you only ever have to do it once!

Bucket list to be edited

Things to do before I die...to be updated and revised as needed.. this was written a while ago.... X=completed
NOT NECESSARILY IN THIS ORDER

* X Get Married
*X See Cirque Du Soleil live
* 1-2 more piercings
* 1 tattoo....henna or otherwise
* Teach and write Sunday school curriculum
* Go snorkeling
* Write a book and get published
* Go on a cruise
* Hike and observe Zion National Park
* Help with missions work over-seas
* Take a culinary class
* Read the entire Great Books Britannica Collection
* See Mt. Rushmore
* Have a baby
* See as many Aquariums as I can
* Get my Masters degree....in ANYTHING
*Xsorta Host a Thanksgiving dinner for ALL my family....successfully
* Read the dictionary
* Italy
* Transpose my Grandfather's life notes and publish it
* Own a NICE cat
* Learn to Draw
* Keep a fish alive for well past its expiration date
* Hike at least part of the Appalachian Trail
* Design and sew a dress (doll or otherwise)
* Jungles of Costa Rica...
*X Buy a house
* Win an argument
* See the Poconos

* Orthopedic certification
* Kinesio taping certification
* Own my own (self-sufficient) business
*
* Kill the messenger.. HHAHAH

Tirade

I am 22 years old, new to my industry and new to the business world; but I am a hard worker and I know a thing or two about professionalism. And dealing with business professionals daily now I am never ceased to be amazed at the unique professionalism of some, and incredibly amateurish, unethical practices of others. For the first time in my little life I am working on a letter (proofread for emotion that might stick in between the lines) and am contemplating on public commentary of a business that has wronged and disrespected me to my face.... or when they thought i had left the room...ha ha their mistake. I am disgusted, embarrassed for this business owner, and shocked about how any form of constructive criticism (what I said could not have even been classified as that, it was an FYI along with how much I appreciate their service) could result in such an attitud

stressed messed

Joseph had to get up at 5 am to take a test before he left for work. Being the dutiful wife that I am I got up with him to promptly fall asleep in his office. I am sure in between snores he SENSED my support. Poor guy, the teacher forgot to release the test until 8:00 so he had to call into work for a few hours. So...this is another interview week for hubby.....he has high hopes for another job and SOON. It really would change a lot for us. And we are praying soooo hard for this! (and all the other interviews he has gone on...*sigh*) So keep him in your prayers around Thursday.

I survived food poisoning via homeopathics on Tuesday, PRAISE God! Terrible that many in our Tuesday meeting group fell ill.

Oh, and our house survived the icky wind yesterday, I cannot say the same for the other houses in our neighborhood.

I did cut a lot of my hair off. That was exciting. hmmmmmm.......
Creamed m husband in a quick game of monopoly last night... its not fun when someone HAS to play by the rules and doesn't play MY family's way...GAH :-)

Wake up in the morning

Loving my new schedule! Out walking this morning, a little running even; quiet time with my hubby...and now he is doing OTHER reading and I have to be quiet BLECH! I don't like to be quiet when I am HYPER. But i need to get ready for work PRONTO.

I am very excited for this weekend, vegas with my brother and Katie w00t! And my brother, ever the organized FREAK that he is ;-) Provided us with directions for all 4 us to create a music playlist for the trip with specific directions. Maybe he found it online, nonetheless i found it quite creative and fun.
Playlists
Rules – No making fun of songs, artists, or selections. It is to be fun and entertaining.

* 20 songs total – please burn onto a CD in this order. Below are listed concepts/feelings which your must provide songs for. Be as creative as you like.

· I can’t believe I’m helping my best friend bury a dead body (2 songs)

· When I look in the mirror I see a tough/sexy man/women (2 songs)

· When you wake up and notice the clock says it’s time to start work NOW (1 songs)

· When all you can do is think about punching your boss really hard in the face (2 songs)

· When you stumble upon the 8th wonder of the world (1 song)

· Songs you love to get stuck in the traffic with (3 songs)

· When all you can do is Dance it out (1 Song)

· At the end of a no good, very bad, terrible day, you’re standing in the middle of nowhere as it begins pour rain. (1 song)

·When you meet your real life hero/celebrity, and they are even cooler than you could have ever dreamed (1 song)

·At the end of the world, you and 6 of your best friends are sitting around a campfire, so you decide to console and bust out your acoustic guitar. (2 songs)

- When you find a random 50 bucks in your old winter jacket (1 song)

· Locked Stocked and Ready to Rock (2 songs)

· Vegas road trip theme song (1 song)

This should be interesting... And you KNOW I fit celtic women in there somewhere muwhahahaha


Our vegas compatriarts. Is it weird to go to vegas if you have morals and don't reall drink? maybe... but Penny slots and cirque de solei YAY



Currently Zack's girls. YEsI am still one of his girls being his only AWESOME sister.




MY dad and his vegas buddy.....he's mad we didn't invite him :-)

bloggggggggggg-ed?

Had a lovely Easter and time with the grandparents when they were here. As well as with Zack and Katie.
Had my 6 month review.
Got a raise and a pay cut...sorta .haha.
Got a speeding ticket, aced traffic school then yesterday JOSEPH got a ticket as well. GAH, could have done without those expenses.
I am currently having another allergic reaction...since cleaning my car out... in the form of hives...AGAIN... on my right forearm *sigh* just loaded up on quercetin and fish oil...again *sigh*

BIRTHDAY

Soooo, my birthday is tomorrow. :-) And as Monday was my day off, Joseph and I CELEBRATED!!!

I slept in and it was cuddle time when Joseph got off work. Breakfast with Robby and Joseph at one of my favorite places of all time the Good Egg! I always fill out a comment card to show my appreciation for that lovely, efficient place.

Huevos Rancheros YUM! Then we drove up to Mt. Lemonn to enjoy the beautiful weather!

Robby and Joseph's heads.


Beautiful!

My face! because I am Almost 22!!

Part of Joseph's birthday spoil k8 awesome extravaganza was to let me pick the music we listened to from MY ipod all day!! :-) A goofy thing but hilarious to all involved.

RING POP!!!!



Enjoying the snow as much as I can...contrary to popular belief snow is COLD.
Me and my love who spoils me rotten!

I had pilates, we hung out with friends and we had ice cream.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!

hohum

my grandparents are visiting from PA for a few weeks, and I have managed to see them a few times already. The family spent the weekend in Phoenix with my brother for an Os Guinness conference and i was able to join them for their final day. I love my grandparents, I TOLERATE their 2 Pomeranian dogs Max and Zoe. I do NOT tolerate their dogs being car sick! Or max puking while crammed in the backseat with me my mom and grandma! BLECH!

So much to do, never enough hours in a day or hours to sleep! I had a blast yesterday but that deserves its own blog for l8r :-)

I finally got a fire truck tour at Joseph's station a few nights ago! I got to climb on that scary ladder truck and sit in all the drivers seats.... it is as thrilling as it sounds, but I am glad I don't have his job. I like my feet on the ground. I can barely drive Miss Cherry Ames (my Mazda 3) let alone something bigger than a school bus.

BIG news. Not sure if you all can handle it.

MEGAN IS MOVING BACK TO TUCSON! or maybe i have mentioned this before? Either way this greatly impacts my life in Tucson. For the better. double hooray!! SEE TEXAS? you silly state that thinks you are SO AWESOME for stealing my Megan.. I WIN!!

A little stuffy today, hoping its just allergies, Ive been sneezing up a storm and they say the pollen count is rather high. I accidentally came to work early. *sigh* I could have slept in another hour...or done laundry.... Either way, must finish a few projects and then head to my networking meeting... boo to my Mondays. which are Tuesdays.

womaniiizer

Church was wonderful.
And today is a little extra special. Yes, I miss Joseph because he is working. But today has been great. I have not felt like such a woman in quite a while.

I .... went.....SHOPPING!! at a MALL and a GROCERY store!! I bought some make-up, a few things for the house and groceries. And I had a blast by myself....and with my bestie from afar Beth who shared with me many MANY phone minutes as and my fun :-)


I feel like such a WOMAN..minus the kidsha ha


heres to a great week, even if I have no spring break. Friends in town tomorrow, a good work week, and my grandparent are on their way from PA driving out for a visit. hooray~

blip

Joseph working to night, I wasting time unfortunately. I tend to not be that productive when my body is so tired after a day like today. Receiving mixed with giving bodywork can take quite a tole. Much needed however, i am praying for good sleep as it has been absent lately. Fun dinner with friends tonight though yay!

So much going on at work I can't seem to quiet my mind most evenings; between my election to being Vice president of our business networking group, the launching of our new website, my 180 day review. And all the various documentation, specialized clients dealing with attorney's, inventory, and our clients. Plus those random, various projects which my lovely boss lady still finds to throw in the mix. However, I also find myself being sidetracked these days with oh...decorating the house via internet searches. :-)

perhaps I will agree to Joseph's plea to have a porch built onto our house to save on cooling in the summer...maybe if he throws in a pet to sweeten the deal.... .... see I AM a reasonable wife!

*sigh* did not complete the last load of laundry but will complete kitchen wipe down before bed.

hmmmmmmmmmmm. Just put many books on hold at the library YAY for more holistic reference, fun reading, and knitting books!



I really need to put myself to bed now so I will be a decent employee in the morning.
Rambles

stimulate your muscle spindles!

I love my husband. Who is working hard at a less-than-mediocre fire station..... today was the 3rd phase of the interview process at a more prominent station in town. over 800 applicants, he has been narrowed down to the under 100 list. Which says a lot about my handsome hubby. However, there is always the chance rejection will happen, yet again, to my man. I cannot STAND that sad,puppy dog look in his eyes in a moment of defeat. I say only a moment, because we are a determined breed; Joseph will not rest till he has conquered the world, and I have no doubt he will. Our timing doesn't always seem to be what God actually wants for our lives. ha ha ha

It all comes back to our contentment. Thomas Watson's words on contentment forever changed my outlook on life. The Bible states simply enough, we are to be content in all circumstances. He more than provides for our little' family's needs AND wants...so who are we to ask for more? Would a more well managed MUCH higher paying job be nice for my husband? ummm YEESSS. But still, are we ready to be entrusted with more? GAH! Ever the reformed person that I am; our group's favorite phrase to spew "Sovereignty of God." I don't know what's going to happen...WHATEVER SOVEREIGNTY OF GOD!! lol


Santa Fe, a few weekends past now, was MARVELOUS. And by that I mean my class and the food. Santa Fe was meh. cold and lame. I learned so much from the Myoskeletal realignment classes and have been using as many new techniques as I can remember in my practice these days. And more classes this weekend in Tucson! yay!

I want a cat.

Never thought thunk or thinked it

Dad is still not doing too well. Home praise God, but not 100%. Worried worried worried. I feel like the whole family is a little on edge.... but what else is new....we just tend to be such a VERY edgy family.!.. What really is there to worry about? The minuscule, minor human 'bean' that I am, have a God more sovereign and just than I can fathom in complete control of my little covenant family. Who am I to question His power over a little health issue?

I enjoyed a glorious weekend with 'the fam' but am, as usual, having trouble back at home getting my head back in the game. I have much to prepare for with 2 very long days at work before J and i head off to New Mexico for my myoskeletal training with Eric Dalton. Packing, laundry, house stuff and hubby, who has sadly been neglected lately...

Looking forward to being out of state for a bit, but praying like crazy dad can be settled and comfortable when I am gone. Of course of every caregiver Mom is the best :-)

*sigh*

yikes

My dad is in the Hospital for multiple pulmonary embolisms etc. And no I am not sure of all of which the etc. contains. I happened to have a wonderfully flexible week at work, which meant I could spend the majority of my time in the SV hospital. In good spirits with a good sense of humor, Dad is handling everything 'well,' although i hope he understands it is 'ok' to be a little anxious or frustrated; we understand his human-ness! He was admitted Superbowl Sunday and has greatly improved albeit slowly, and is coming to terms with the commitment to recovery he must now face.

Needless to say it has been an 'interestingly' tough week

Any and all prayers are greatly appreciated. Not sure yet when he will be released, hopefully by Monday... ... ...

blip

"I'm sick of following my dreams, I'm just going to ask where there going and hook up with them later!"
oh the wisdom of Mitch Hedberg, the inspirational, horribly-mouthed comedian who OD'd...

Had a wonderful dinner with my awesome brother this evening, we met half way in Casa Grande so he, in all his wisdom on the matter, could help me formulate a plan to start transforming my massage career. Setting boundaries, renegotiating contracts, etc. He happened to be very insightful, definitely did his research on my industry. I am very encouraged.


But, it also got me thinking about my future. I love my industry, I have not been in it very long. I wish there was enough hours in the day for me to pursue EVERYTHING.
My second priority would be writing. And then education. So much to learn and study and write on my own. And then of course I need to go back to school. Wow.

Perhaps if there were 32 hours in a day, and I only slept 8 and worked 8 ; oh and of course add another 8 for JOSEPH..then there would leave 8 hours for other pursuits. delicious.

ESFJ

I am a massage therapist. This can be a very physically but more so emotionally exhausting job. Don't hear what I'm not saying, I absolutely love my job, I cannot imagine doing anything else as a career, and for what feels like the first time ever, I am actually good at what I do.

However, what I have realized, is there are more energy vampires in the world than I could have imagined. And not just clients on the table; people I speak to on the phone, business people I network, have the ability to suck the life out of me if I let them. And who pays the price? When everything is getting sucked out of you during the day, the empty person goes home to a spouse who is not receiving what he should.

Lately, I have been trying to avoid having my emotional energy stolen. My job is to help your body cope with what is effecting it, purely physically, or the emotional pain which manifests itself into physical pain. By all means vent on the table, let someone else handle your pain for a moment, I really don't mind. But, I am now checking the baggage at the *massage* table as it were. I am taking a deep breath on the way home, so when I arrive I am new, rejuvenated and not dwelling on the issues of others, the stress, or the gratification of my job.

I am trying to bring home only me at my best attitude.


Another interesting facet to my industry which I personally find fascinating; is when the connection between you and a client is strong. The person that gets on your table, and the person they see as their therapist, are completely different when the session is over. Some people just need to be heard, need to have their wisdom shared, and I am honored to be the recipient. As a therapist you are always listening to the body, or the person; and when you are really and truely listening, a bond happens which is unique and different. And at the end of the session you are each seen with a new found respect for one another.

Perhaps it is my age, but many times I get the "my god you look 12 years old look" and half way through the session... "how are you so strong?" and "thank you so so much." And I love to help people. And I am so thankful I work for people who recognize your efforts and who want to be helped. I work for very grateful people. When you come down to it, even though I work in a more medicinal/orthopedic massage industry, technically I am still just your service person. So, am I every grateful for their gratefulness.

One limitation to my job is the inability, during a session, to tell somebody Jesus is seeking them and loves them. I don't believe that is considered inside my 'scope of practice,' but these people need the gospel. I just need to seek my opportunities and pray for good timing... ...

Ski bunny

Snowboarding was an utter utter disaster! I believe I bruised every area on my body physically possible, and was never able to stay uprate long enough to see if I even enjoyed it! Hilarious actually... and as Joseph breezed by me, he could have only been described as floating; he said more than once "I just don't see you as a snowboarder snookums, you're my ski bunny!"

After the first day on the slopes I hung up my snow board FOREVER! The second day Joseph and I were not sure if we wanted to go again, as I could hardly move to begin with, but why waste a gorgeous day in the White Mountains? This time JOSEPH decided to try snow boarding, which lasted 20 minutes....

I didn't fall once on my skis! It was an absolutely gorgeous clear day, and we stayed together on the easier slopes for me, and we traversed all over those mountains. What a wonderful way to spend our 6 month anniversary.

I am still tragically sore this morning, and need to rally myself for my business meeting, and giving treatments this afternoon.

ogglewah

I have 3 treatments in the morning and then its off to Sunrise to skiing with my husband. Nervous as always to defy my fear of cold, heights and losing control and breaking my neck haha ha but it should be fun.

My boss comes back this weekend, .. ..... I hope my work was adequate. A few major things came up so *criss cross applesauce*

I received a massage today from a student at my old massage school. Terrible, but encouraging at the same time. I hope to see more orthopedic minded MT's like him in the future.

hmmm not much else to report. I am currently watching the OC, though i really should be doing some laundry and some packing.... blech

blog-gerr-ing

My goals for 2010 have slowly begun to establish themselves. Time to think BIGGER. Sub-contractor/ Independent contractor... I am carefully weighing the pros and cons with Joseph and am preparing to have a talk with my boss soon too. I thought i would be perfectly content as an employee, and for the most party I am; however the freedom J and I would like in our lifestyle and relationship is a bit on the stiff side. Blessed as I am that my financial obligation to our little family is purely supplemental, I would even take a bit of a pay cut in order to have a bit more flexibility. So, i am working on building clientele.....good luck with that self. But it will all be ok... I have a wicked elevator speech


Joseph has surpassed every expectation I may have had about that boy I married. Supportive, patient, and oh so very thoughtful.. most days I count my blessings with such a calm certainty.

My biggetst "New Year's resolution" was to begin freeing myself from the bondage of fear and anxiety. The pathetic worrier that I am has had me quite exasperated! How I can frustrate myself for so long and not take the hint that God was calling me to trust Him more... hint much? Slowly but surely, my days and thoughts are calmer, my b12 is regulated, and His grace is sufficient.

J and I are going skiing this weekend! A nice outing that will most likely kick my butt! However, there is something so thrilling still about our little adventures, staying in hotels, doing dangerous deeds (skiing hullo) and in the white mountains most likely enjoying staying warm and cozy, with joseph sitting on my feet!

I highly recommend marriage! We are going on 6 months of wedded bliss, and since month 3 ended I feel things are getting simplier as we are finding our stride. Well, perhaps it was just K8 who need her stride to be found; but I am getting there, a lot of adjustments in such a short time, but God is working and moving in my life inexplicably. Maybe one of these days I will actually wake up feeling like an adult instead of feeling like a child with way too much responsibility! ha ha... When did I grow up? not sure; but it must have happened.

Random as this was I am not going to take the time to organize it, I have laundry to fold.