The diary of a fly

I used to play this piece on the piano by Bartok called the Diary of a Fly. Youtube it. It is fabulous. and short. And I loved playing it back in the day when I had talent :-)
I remember after a fundraising performance I had played someone came up to me at the mingle time after the concert and said "I would tell you that you played beautiful, except that piece is anything but beautiful!" ummmm thanks?? It was true the dissonance of Bartok's genius could be unnerving to some, and as much as I loved the piece it wasn't necessarily enjoyable to my audience. Of all my piano performances in my 12 years of classical piano, this incident has never left my mind. And lately I feel I relate to my Bartok performances more than ever before. I could perform technically flawless in....let's say 'life' and still its just not what someone wanted to hear. Personal preference. Biased opinion. Subjective assessments. When your best just isn't good enough. ouch?

I guess that is why we can only perform our best and try to see God as our only audience, my job is glorify HIM and enjoy HIM forever right? Easier said then done...

I suppose a thank you to Bartok is in order for a life lesson